Friday, May 20, 2022

Passing the Torch

 I just came home from  seeing the new Downton Abbey movie and while I won't give any spoilers I will say if you are a Downton aficionado you will need to see this. I will say everyone was back and everyone looks older, but then, don't we all.

While I was sitting there my mind was racing thinking of passing the torch to the next generation and what it means.  If Downton Abbey taught us anything it taught us to respect that there is a way to do things and the importance of doing them properly.  It taught us there is importance to generational living.  We don't have an Abbey at our disposal for space nor servants but we are reminded the importance of including the elders in our lives.  They just might have something to say.



As I watched my mind went to  these three women, PH's mother and two aunts, who were so appropriately posed in this photo.  Joined at the hip.  They were farm girls who came up through life with a work ethic. They were well schooled in how-it-is-done. I didn't come from these women, I didn't have their example growing up but PH did.  I could see, over time, that their way was the right way.

They passed the concept of taking care of your family through their actions.  The familes stuck together as long as they were alive and when they weren't it was like our generation was given permission to go live without that glue.  We might not have liked their dictates but we missed them when we were on our own.  Sometimes I wonder what they are thinking as they look down on us now.  I feel certain they are cringing now and then.

Passing the torch is the same problem for the women who have held up the social order of our little city for decades and now are aging out.  Some are sick. Some are in assisted living homes, some are gone and some are just plain tired of being the ones who did it all. They are in their high 80's now and  while they are still willing they are looking over their shoulders for the next generation to step up.  They are tired and dealing with all of the glitches life gives you when you're 88.

I've seen how delighted they are to finally, finally, be the guest and not the one who always did it all.

All I could think of while enjoying the movie was  the passing of the generational torch, and the passing of time, and understanding the new and appreciating the old and hoping we learned from them.

And I think I may have to see the movie again so I can concentrate on it.  But do go, it was really, really good.


5 comments:

  1. some people just don't have any of that do they............

    ReplyDelete
  2. I've never seen Downton Abbey, but I have recently pondered the things you have written about here, as my parents and in-laws are all gone now, and I find I am no longer anxious to do "all the things" myself. My siblings and I each had our own area of focus, and together we covered the bases of the things our parents had tried to do to maintain a cohesive family, immediate and extended. I look at the next generation and wonder who will take over the things my generation has done for years now to keep family ties strong--reunions, extended family gatherings, holiday traditions, collecting and printing family histories. Will those things be important to the generations to come?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I have wondered the same thing Denise, our family and the one I married into are fractured, we have occasional catch ups but not the more cohesive types we had when parents were alive. But I am happy to say the cousins, in their 30's get on well together and while they are busy in their own lives they do make the effort to catch up with each other. I do wonder how the family unit will be in the future. Looking forward to seeing the movie.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Very thought provoking post, hope to get to see the movie this weekend

    ReplyDelete
  5. That's a beautiful story . I watched the movie and thoroughly enjoyed it in gold class, feet up with a glass of wine

    ReplyDelete